The Sunday Blog

11th May 2014

Emotionally, I’ve not been feeling so great this week. Of course, I was happy to finish my exams this Tuesday, but the final exam was tough and I really don’t think I did myself justice. And of course, seeing the Spirit on Wednesday was quite special, but I was in complete agony walking to the docks to see it.

I’ve been having a real tough time with my hip recently and it only seems to be getting worst. I can barely walking to the shops without being in extreme pain and limping. And I’m so embarrassed about it. I know people are staring at me because I can’t walk properly any more. It’s getting to the point where I don’t want to leave the house for the fear of being stared at and because I can’t stand the pain. And I hate taking pain killers. I don’t want to be dependent on drugs just to get me through the day.

I’m trying to go swimming more now my exams are over and I’m in my summer holidays. I’m aiming to go every Friday. I’ve decided to start paying and using the pool in one of the local hotels. It’s still cheaper than paying to get a taxi to the free swimming pool and back again. It’s not like I can walk there any more. Hopefully swimming will help build some muscle are around my hip. It certainly feels great being in the water, and I don’t have any pain at all. Well, until I start walking back when it kicks in again.

The uni are helping me to apply for student disability support from the government. I will get help towards buying text books and paying for internet so that I don’t have to keep going back and forth to the library. I’m just hoping I can get some support for field trips because right now I don’t feel like I’d be well enough to go on any trips. I have an appointment with the physiotherapist next Monday which I’m hoping will be beneficial. I’m just frustrated with the NHS that it takes months to see a physiotherapist when you are extreme pain and you can only walk for 10 minutes. It’s a disgrace!

So, as I am unable to go to the shops to spend my money I have decided to do some window shopping, online style. Here are a few of my favourite pieces, all from H&M.

1. I’ve never owned a little black dress, and although this one is more for casual wear I really feel like I could get some use out of it. Plus it’s only £7.99 (US$13.46 approx.).

2. I’ve been looking for a dress for the beach that I can just throw on over my bikini when I’m on holiday. I love the pattern on this one.

3. I just love the colour of this dress, but I’d really need to try it on to see how it fit my body.

4. Cute white vests are my favourite things to wear in the summer because you can dress them up or down. I need more!

5. This top has seahorses on it! Say no more! I don’t own any crop tops so I’m not sure how it would look but I think I could probably pull it off. ;)

So, I was mainly thinking about holiday wear when picking out these items. I previously mentioned that Tyrone and I were looking to get a last-minute deal on a holiday once our exams were finished. However, thanks to my condition getting worse, I’m not sure going on holiday is the best idea right now. I can’t miss my physiotherapy appointment because it’s so important. But the longer we wait the more expensive the holidays get, not to mention the fact everywhere will be full of kids in the summer holidays.

I’m just feeling so downbeat. I just want to get away in to the sun, but what if something goes wrong? What if my condition gets worse? I don’t want to be stuck in a hotel. I want to explore, and I just don’t feel like I can at the moment.

I just never imagined a few months ago that my luck could get any worse, but it has. I just know what to do any more. :(

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  1. I am sorry to hear about your hip giving you hell now! I don’t like relying on painkillers for everything and I have heard about your hip problems before and can understand you must be sick of it by now. :( I hope there’s something you can do about it or that it feels better soon so you can enjoy yourself and not have to worry about it.

    On the other hand, online window shopping is the best. I can’t believe you have never owned a little black dress though, that’s an issue easily fixed. ;) I have too many, I wish I could give you one haha.

    We don’t have H&M in Australia but when I went to Hong Kong and Japan I liked shopping there. They have a different style of clothes to Australian stores! Admittedly I didn’t buy much, but window shopping of any kind is fun. :3

    • Thanks. I really hope so too. Yeah, after 20 years I’m pretty sick and tired of it. :S

      I’m sure I read somewhere that they were going to start opening branches of H&M in Australia, which is pretty exciting. They have such a great range of clothes and it’s pretty cheap too.

  2. The printed flare dress looks beautiful! I’m sorry to hear about your hip; what happened to it, if you don’t mind me asking? I just finished exams, so I kinda know how you feel, although I’m just happy that they are over and I can begin enjoying summer.

    Brittney

    Another Beautiful Thing

    • I was born with a condition called development dysplasia of the hip, which means that I was born without a hip socket on my left side. I’ve had a lot of surgery to fix it but nothing has really worked.

  3. Cat

    Oh no, sorry to hear that your hip has been getting worse :( I hope the appointment goes well, and that you’ll get the student disability support. I can understand not wanting to be dependent on painkillers, so I hope they find something that can help.

    I like all the pieces you picked out! The tops are especially cute, and I really like the blue dress. I like having a dress I can wear over my swimsuit too. I have one that I only use for that :)

    I hope your hip gets better so you can take a vacation!

    • Hopefully I will be able to go out and actually buy some of these items. I’m sure a bit of retail therapy would cheer me up.

  4. Jea

    I’m sorry about your hip. I hope it gets better soon. The pain sounds really bad.

    Those are some really great pieces. I’ll probably go online shopping there. I’m sure you’ll be able to pull off that crop top. :)

    Hope the next days will be a little bit brighter for you. Take care! :)

    • H&M is great but I normally only shop in store. I like to try things on before I buy them because the sizing can be so varied.

  5. Jamie

    I’m sorry to hear that you’re having hip problems! I don’t like pain killers myself, but I do take them every now and again for my back. You shouldn’t be embarrassed if people stare at you. People will stare, and they will talk. What they don’t understand — they will never understand. I just simply do the best that I can. If it bothers you that much — just laugh at their stupidity or stay indoors trying to do some Pilattes or some light exercises. It may increase you to the point of not hurting. I do planks for my back.

    I love the new layout and I’m sorry I haven’t been by for awhile! Truth is — I’ve been doing book reviewing instead of blogging about my life. I don’t have anything really going on at all so why force myself to blog when I don’t have anything going on? That’s when I decided to blog about my books that I’ve read! So that’s what I’ve been doing. Collided-hour is no more :(. I loved that domain because it was two songs that my boyfriend wrote which were smashed together. But ah well. I found a better domain.

    • I really want to get back into doing yoga. I use to do it daily before my hip started causing me problems. It’s just I need to stop worrying about doing more harm to myself and my hip.

      Reviewing books is awesome. I’ve been thinking about incorporating book reviews in to my blog. It will just be every now and again because I’m a slow reader.

  6. It hasn’t even been that long since I finished university, and yet I feel hella old when I hear my friends and other people are either just finishing university or just finishing their second year. Crazy!

    I hope everything gets better with your hip. Hopefully you’ll get that support – I love things like that from the government. Medicine can be quite expensive over here and as someone who’s allergic to everything and has eczema, it was cool to see that there was support for people with low incomes. People can say what they want about the NHS, but they do actually help :)

    LOVE that dress for the beach. As you know I’m going to Barcelona in June, so I might have to look into that purchase. H&M are top notch for cheap summer wear :)

    Hopefully you do get to go away on holiday – got my fingers crossed for ya!

    • I have to admit the free prescriptions for people on low incomes and students has been fantastic. I have certainly used this service a lot with acne treatments, pills and pain killers. And free dental treatment! It’s been a real life saver.

  7. AnneMarie

    I’m sorry to hear about your hip. I hope you feel better soon!

    Loving the different H&M outfits too. I especially love #3. The colors and print seem pretty unique.

    Hope you get a chance to take a break and get away soon! (:

  8. Hopefully you’re feeling better by now. Congratulations on finishing your finals though! It’s not always a delight taking painkillers or having to deal with people staring, but stay strong! Keep on doing what you gotta do to lessen the pain. Swimming is a great workout, especially since it works with many parts of your body :).

    Those are some nice outfits! My favorite out of these would probably be 1 and 4 XD.

    I wish you the best!

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